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Sunday Silly

by: masslass

Sun Aug 14, 2011 at 00:06:39 AM EST


You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on...

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this:  

masslass :: Sunday Silly
        COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

       ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

       COSTELLO: Thanks I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

       ABBOTT: Mac?

       COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

       ABBOTT: Your computer?

       COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

       ABBOTT: Mac?

       COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

       ABBOTT: What about Windows?

       COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

       ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

       COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

       ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

       COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

       ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

       COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

       ABBOTT: Office.

       COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

       ABBOTT: I just did.

       COSTELLO: You just did what?

       ABBOTT: Recommend something.

       COSTELLO: You recommended something?

       ABBOTT: Yes.

       COSTELLO: For my office?

       ABBOTT: Yes.

       COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

       ABBOTT: Office.

       COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

       ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

       COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

       ABBOTT: Word.

       COSTELLO: What word?

       ABBOTT: Word in Office.

       COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

       ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

       COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

       ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

       COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

       ABBOTT: Money.

       COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

       ABBOTT: Money.

       COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

       ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

       COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

       ABBOTT: Money.

       COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

       ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

       COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

       ABBOTT: One copy.

       COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

       ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

       COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

       ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

       (A few days later)

       ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

       COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

       ABBOTT: Click on 'START'..... ........

 

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Sunday Silly | 12 comments
'nother one (2.00 / 1)
     
   Eileen and her husband Bob went for counseling after 35 years of marriage.

   When asked what the problem was, Eileen went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 35 years they had been married.

   She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

   Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking Eileen to stand, unbuttoned her blouse, embraced her, put his hands on her breasts, and kissed her passionately as her husband Bob watched with a raised eyebrow.

   Eileen shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down as though in a daze.

   The therapist turned to Bob and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?'

   Bob thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf.'


The government does not run on unicorn kisses and/or butterfly farts.


Sometimes I wish (2.00 / 1)
I golfed, and had a wife, just for the string of golf/wife jokes.

Nah, never mind.  

T-L SOTB


[ Parent ]
How I entertain myself (2.00 / 1)
Click on the clock and watch what happens, watch the clock run for awhile.  It's always the right time. Then click on one of the little men and it turns digital...click again and it turns regular, with second hands as well!

http://lovedbdb.com/nudemenClo...

The government does not run on unicorn kisses and/or butterfly farts.


Honeyboy makin it talk. (2.00 / 1)


T-L SOTB

I'm all for silly (2.00 / 2)
sometimes.

Up to my arse in guests (again), including a compact Italian model I wouldn't mind taking for a spin (body by Pinadonki, haven't checked the tires).

Excelsior (and foam peanuts, also, too)


Hmmph. FINE!!!!!!!! (2.00 / 1)


T-L SOTB

[ Parent ]
For someone (2.00 / 2)
who's not a people person, he sure does entertain a lot, doesn't he?!!

The government does not run on unicorn kisses and/or butterfly farts.

[ Parent ]
You bear it, (0.00 / 0)
we'll share it!!  HA!

The government does not run on unicorn kisses and/or butterfly farts.

[ Parent ]
he sure does entertain a lot... (2.00 / 2)
not as far as I can tell.

T-L SOTB

[ Parent ]
with (0.00 / 0)
whipped cream??  yummmm

The government does not run on unicorn kisses and/or butterfly farts.

[ Parent ]
Sunday Silly | 12 comments





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